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'Gift of giving' teaches kids the right message
by Richard Tanner, Guest Columnist
Found in: The Sun Courier
12-17-2004
With the holidays coming, parents are once again besieged with guilt. They know they should stop spoiling their kids and guide them away from selfishness and keeping the focus on themselves. But how? Fewer gifts? Tighter budget? Bread and water for dinner?
According to one wealth management expert, the best gift for any child of any age is giving the "gift of giving."
Instead of asking for more stuff that many of us don't need, teach children how to "self-direct" a sum of money to a charity they care deeply about. Young Americans don't save for the same reason they don't give: selfishness. They're still in accumulation/conservation mode and are not solid in their awareness of their own mortality, personal beliefs, ideals, and preferences. It's not until they reach their 40's and beyond that they begin to save and give from their principles."
The ACT method is one way to teach children to give. The basics of this method are:
A - Acclimate
From an early age introduce your children to money through your own family financial and buying situations: smart grocery shopping, coupons, sales, banking, checking accounts, purchase of household items, and purchase of large items like a home or vehicle.
During the holidays, have a family discussion to determine home much money will be spent and limit the dollar amount of traditional gifts. Each child should have his or her own money to budget for presents for family members and friends. Even young children can begin to do this.
C - Communicate
Communication is more than simply telling kids information. Listen to their questions about wealth, money and the responsibility of helping others who have less.
The holidays are a great time to talk about the charities that help those who have less. Choose one and have each child give of their money and/or time to that charity. have them write down their feelings about their gift. Save their written thoughts so they can see how their feelings about giving change over the years.
T - Train
Training your children involves a lot of creative strategies that need to be customized for each family's lifestyle, values, activities, passions.
If your child doesn't already get an allowance, the holidays are a great time to start. Giving kids an allowance lets them develop a budget for themselves, using a stipend for clothing, entertainment and a charitable contribution they can direct themselves throughout the year.
Richard Tanner is president and founder of Ownership Advisors, Inc. an Independence based wealth management firm, and creator of the Loving Will™, an estate planning tool that clarifies and communicates family values through specially designed legal documents. He also is co-author of "Giving . . . Philanthropy for Everyone".
To receive additional information please contact:
Richard Tanner
Ownership Advisors, Inc.
Voice (216) 328-5538
Fax: (216) 328-5531
or by email at:
rtanner@ownershipadvisors.com
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